


Meanwhile, On The Other Side of Town

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: C.J. McGarry: Second Lady [12]
Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 18:32:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6669685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What chapter of your memoir will being pulled over by the cops while blasting rap music be in Leo?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Meanwhile, On The Other Side of Town

**Near 15th and Ellipse, 9:27pm**

_First things first, I poppa, freaks all the honeys  
Dummies, playboy bunnies, those wanting money_

"I am truly going to do harm to myself if I have to hear anymore rap music." Toby grumbled as he started the Navigator. The Notorious B.I.G. blasted through the speakers as they pulled away from 701.

"At least this is a good song." Josh said.

"How do you know?" Leo asked. "How do you know what he is talking about?"

"I did my best to turn it down some." Charlie said. "That is as far as it will go. This is a good song."

"Whoa, I did hear that." Leo said. "Did he just say something about penetration and sanitation?"

"I think so." Sam replied. "I believe Navajos were also mentioned."

"I can't believe that you got that much." Toby said. "Oh OK, I just got sex is immaculate from the back."

"Hey, let us not turn this into a rap bashing session." Charlie said. "Whether you like it or not, it is an art form and Biggie Smalls is Van Gogh."

"Yeah." Josh agreed. "Don’t hate the playa people...hate the game. He’s right anyway, sex is immaculate from the back."

"This from the elitist." Toby said.

"Don’t help Josh." Sam said. "And that was what we call too much information."

"Especially since you are sleeping with my niece." Leo added.

"OK."

"Biggie Smalls?" Leo asked. "Nice play on words. I thought this was the Incredible B.I.G."

"Notorious B.I.G." Josh said, stifling a laugh. "Most rappers have more than one name."

"For heaven’s sake, why?" Toby asked.

"Does it really matter?" Sam asked.

"Seriously, if you guys sit and listen you might come away with something." Josh said. "You sound like our parents talking about the Rolling Stones and Elvis."

Charlie nodded from the front seat.

"I think I like the B.I.G. more than I like Elvis." Leo said. "Hey Toby, turn on 15th and Ellipse...we’re going to sneak in the back way."

"I think it is impossible to sneak past Ron Butterfield." Sam replied.

"I won't be. He knows I am gone. I am sure there are agents following us now. We’ll find out if the bullets fly."

Toby turned the corner. After driving another six feet he saw the lights and heard the sirens.

"Fuck." He slapped the steering wheel and pulled over near a parking space.

Rolling down the window, the rap music greeted Capitol Hill.

"Turn down the music." The officer said, not able to hide his surprise when he saw the man behind the wheel was a Jewish man in his fifties.

"I can't officer." Toby replied.

"Why?"

"Something is wrong with the radio. I would have to shut down the engine."

"Do it."

Toby did. The officer stared at him hard.

"I need your license and registration. Is this your vehicle?"

"No."

"Yours?" Charlie got a flashlight shined in his face.

"No. It is a company car." He said.

"What company?" he scrutinized Toby’s license.

"We work at the White House." Toby replied. "We took the vehicle out to have dinner."

"Where are you coming from?" the officer asked.

"Can you tell us why we were pulled over?" Charlie asked. "Other than the obvious reason."

"I think you would do better not to cop an attitude son."

"Charlie, don’t." Leo said from the back seat.

The flashlight shone on Sam, Josh, and Leo. Then it was shining down on their feet and over their heads.

"Have any of you been drinking?"

"Don’t answer that." Toby said. "I want to know right now why we've been pulled over."

"You turned in a no turn on red zone, Perry Mason. You also have a busted taillight and your loud music is violating the city ordinance. Why don’t you sit tight while I run this? I’ll be right back."

He walked away and Charlie sighted heavily.

"This is bullshit." He said. "To be sure, everyone in this car knows why we were pulled over."

"Hmm...SUV." Toby said.

"Tinted windows." Sam added.

"Incredible B.I.G." Leo finished.

"Just as long as we are on the same page." Charlie replied.

"And that’s Notorious." Josh said.

"I can't wait to see the look on his face when he finds out who he pulled over." Sam said.

"Why are we waiting so long?" Leo asked.

"Fear factor." Toby replied. "They figure the longer we sit here, the more fidgety we get. Then they can pull us out and search the car for drugs."

"Well, I am getting out."

"Leo!" Charlie exclaimed.

Leo unstrapped himself and opened the car door. The officer closest to him put his hand on his weapon when he saw him emerge.

"Get back in the car sir or I will draw my weapon."

Leo held up both hands.

"I am the Vice-President of the United States and I refuse to wait any longer."

The other officer looked up and Leo saw recognition in his eyes.

"Oh Christ. You're Leo McGarry. He said. "Sir, please get back in the car." He walked toward him. "You shouldn’t be out in the open this way."

"Sometimes I like a quiet dinner." Leo replied, getting back in the car.

"I am sorry we kept you waiting so long." The second officer came back with Toby’s license. "Our computer equipment is slow tonight. We will let you go with a warning this time Mr. Ziegler...please get the taillight fixed. We will escort you back to the White House so there will be no more problems."

"I don’t think that’s necessary." Leo replied. "I don’t want to call anymore attention to myself. If you could radio ahead to make sure that we are not stopped again I would appreciate it."

"Of course Mr. Vice-President. Have a good night, and we are sorry about the delay."

Toby rolled up his window, turning on the car. Notorious B.I.G. was back.

_She’s sick of that song on how it’s so long  
Thought he worked until I handled my biz_

"It is not that bad if you listen to it all day." Toby said of the song. "I think I know a lot of the words by now."

_Schemin’, don’t leave your girl round me  
True playa for real, ask Puff Daddy_

"I am still going to be a crotchety old man and say this music is definitely for the young." Leo replied. "Clocking still means what I think it does, right?"

"Yeah." Sam replied. "What chapter of your memoirs will being pulled over by the cops blasting rap music be in Leo?"

By now, Charlie and Toby were up front in full rap mode. That made Josh smile.

"Did you see him get all Commando?" Josh asked. "Getting out of the car and demanding to know what was taking so long. You da man Leo."

"Yeah, I don’t like waiting. It worked didn’t it. CJ is going to be pissed though. I don’t see how this can't make the paper in one form or another."

***

**15th and Potomac, 9:42pm**

 

_It’s the remix to ignition_  
Hot and fresh out the kitchen  
Mama rollin’ that body  
Got every man in here wishing  
Sippin’ on Coke and rum  
It’s like so what I'm drunk  
It’s the freakin’ weekend  
Baby I'm about to have me some fun.

"That’s yellow Nora; you can make it." CJ said from the passenger seat of the Jaguar XJ8.

She stepped on the gas, blowing through the now red light. They heard the sirens and Nora looked hard at CJ.

"Damn, it’s the man." Donna giggled from the back.

"I run this yellow all the time." CJ reasoned. "I've never been pulled over."

She reached to turn the music down as Nora pulled her license and registration. Rolling down the window, she smiled at the officer.

"Good evening officer." She put on her best voice and smile.

"License and registration ma'am."

Nora handed it over, still smiling.

"Do you know why I pulled you over ma'am?"

"No." Nora lied.

"You ran the red light." He said.

"What! It was yellow when..."

"Yellow means yield ma'am. Have you ladies been drinking tonight?"

He shone the flashlight in the car. CJ in the passenger seat, Donna and Daisy crunched in the back.

"Just wine with dinner." Nora replied. "I would be happy to take a breathalyzer test."

"I doubt that is necessary. Hold on while I run your license and license plate. Just sit tight ladies."

He walked away and Nora glared at CJ.

"Just blow the light Nora." She mimicked.

"That guy went to special cop school." Daisy said. "All your charm fell on deaf ears."

"It was good." Donna said. "I certainly would let you off with a warning."

"Thanks."

"If he gets mean I can pull my Second Lady card." CJ offered.

"Hell no!" Nora hissed. "I don’t want this in the Post tomorrow morning. Danny Concannon and his damn police scanner. He will never let us live it down. You are not allowed to speak."

"Here you are Mrs. Ziegler." The officer handed everything back to her. "I am going to write you a ticket and I hope in the future you have better regard for traffic laws. Someone could have been injured."

"Thank you officer."

She took the ticket, handing it directly to CJ.

"$185!" CJ exclaimed. "Is this not a little extreme?"

"It’s the charge for running a red light in the District. Have a good night ladies."

"But I am sure we can work this out. I'm CJ Mc..."

"Thank you officer."

Nora rolled up the window.

"You were going to do it...you were going to pull the Second Lady card. I should fit you for a muzzle."

Donna and Daisy laughed in the back. CJ just smirked.

"This is highway robbery." She reasoned.

"It is the price we pay to keep it out of the paper CJ." Daisy said. "At least keep you out of the paper...Nora’s ticket is now a matter of public record."

"Well, that is over and done with." Donna said. "Let’s get back to the music."

"I could not agree more." Nora replied.

She started the car and R. Kelly pumped from the speakers.

 _Cuz after the show it’s the_...

"After party!" CJ exclaimed.

 _And after the party it’s the_...

"Hotel lobby." Donna said.

 _And round about four they gotta_...

"Clear the lobby." Daisy said.

 _So you take it to your room and_...

"Uh somebody." Nora finished.

They sang, laughed, and danced all the way back to the White House.

"Should we tell Leo about this?" Donna asked.

"I don’t see why not." CJ replied.

"Well, I don’t know if I am telling knucklehead. I will pay the ticket and act as if it never happened. Next time Daisy will drive and no one listens to CJ."

They pulled into the underground lot just as Leo and his Senior Staff were climbing out of the SUV. Without even realizing it, they formed a diamond around him just as the Secret Service would. That made the women smile. Nora got out of the car, making a loud whistle with her two fingers. They turned to look at her.

"Hey ladies."

"Josh."

They all got out of the car; Donna had a bit of trouble. Josh got a kick out of that.

"How was your quiet dinner out?" CJ asked. She was instantly at her husband’s side.

"Eventful." Sam said.

"What happened?" Donna asked.

"CJ, I am sure deep down that somewhere you will see the funny in this." Leo said.

"What happened?"

"Apparently we had a busted taillight and didn’t know." Sam said.

"So we were pulled over by the police on 15th and Ellipse." Toby said. "We were also blasting rap music because of some radio malfunction."

"You were pulled over by the police?" Daisy asked, not able to stop herself from laughing. "Oh this is too much."

"They had the flashlight on us and everything." Sam said. "They mistook us for drug kingpins."

"What!" CJ looked at her husband.

"Oh it gets better." Charlie said.

"How?" Nora asked.

"Leo channeled Clint Eastwood and just gets out of the car. Says he’s the Vice-President of the United States and he doesn’t want to be kept waiting anymore." Josh said. "The cops just start sputtering. Gives Toby back his license offering to escort us back to the White House."

"Sounds like an adventure speechwriter. Another story for the kids. Any scary California flashbacks?"

"Don't even joke Nora." Toby and Charlie said in unison.

"Well, our story pales in comparison." Donna said as they all filed onto the elevator. "We certainly weren’t mistaken for drug runners."

"What happened to you guys?" Leo asked.

"It seems that DC Metro police were busy tonight." Daisy replied. "We were pulled over on 16th and Potomac."

"You're kidding."

They got off the elevator near the West Wing.

"Nora went through the yellow but the cop insisted it was red." CJ said. "She didn’t even let me pull my Second Lady card."

"Because I did not want it in the paper. It was worth the $185 ticket."

"$185!" Sam exclaimed. "Holy moley."

"I will pay the ticket." Leo said. "I am sure that my lovely wife told you to blow that light. She always tells Lewis to."

"You don’t have to do that Mr. Vice-President." Nora said.

"I insist. Sounds like we both had adventures tonight. Its not over...we’re trying to secure a Senate vote on pharmaceutical spending for AIDS medicine before the end of the week."

"What about banking?" Donna asked.

"Next week hopefully. The President is working on that. C’mon people, we have to get back to work. Good evening ladies."

"Good evening Mr. Vice-President. Later guys."

***


End file.
